When I Am Weak....

Being a matured single lady can be hard especially if you have been married before. You miss companionship and it can be very lonely, nights especially. I struggled (and still do) very hard at the very early stage of my singleness (as a widow). I yearned for intimacy and wished things were back to how it was before, but obviously, that can only stay as a wish.

But as each day comes, I keep growing in the Lord. I remember my Father in the Lord, telling me that if it happens that I fall, I should pick myself up, confess and repent to the Lord and move on. Obvioulsy, the consequences of it is a setback in my walk with the Lord. But I will and should keep walking with the Lord.

I also have come to realise why it was very hard in my struggle in the early stage. I was trying to obey the law: "Do not fornicate", "Do not commit adultery". I was trying to do it in my power and strength.

Galatians 5:4

"For if you are trying to make yourselves right with God by keeping the law, you have been cut off from Christ! You have fallen away from God’s grace!"

I am understanding that it is my love for the Lord that can help me to receive the grace that He has made available for me and situations like this. I am made to bring pleasure to Him. My life is supposed to be pleasing in His sight. And that is my desire because I love Him. So why would I want to hurt somebody that I love or who loves me so much?

And with this revelational knowledge, every single time I feel overwhelmed with the struggle, I cry out unto Him. And this will make you laugh: I sing myself to sleep with songs like these:

"Hold me close, let your love surround me
Bring me near, draw me to Your side
And as I wait, I rise up like an eagle
And I will soar with You
Your Spirit leads me on
By the power of Your love"

"Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms"

There was another one I sang the other day, but cannot remember. And everytime I talk about it or think about it, I laugh at myself, but thanking God for the abundance of grace at each moment that I cry out to Him.

And so, I am using this opportunity to encourage singles out there, matured, young or old; secure yourself in His love. Let God be real to you and in your singleness, you will find strength.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10

"Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong."